I'll get you neighbors and your little dog too!!

I'm writing this hoping you will all feel free to leave me a comment with some advice. Our downstairs neighbors are of the small, purse-dog instead of kids variety. They admittedly don't want kids, drive fancy cars, and wear fancy clothes to work. We obviously have nothing in common with them. They've taken to complaining about the noise we make. Apparantly we are giving their dog anxiety attacks and they're getting worse everyday. Now at first we were all nicey nice about it to each other, but its just escalating. Apparantly we sound like we are coming through the ceiling all day long. The second one of my kids does something they aren't supposed to like jump off the furniture, or body slam another person to the ground they are up here lickety split. I'm telling you these people must sprint up the stairs because I'll barely finish telling them to quit it and there she is. She gets madder every day. I keep telling her that we're trying to move as soon as our lease is up but that just makes her madder since thats not until March. I have tried to explain how hard it is to keep 4 kids quiet and that kids are just noisy but she does not get it. Tonight she came up and tried to get me to come down and listen to my family's noise. I admit its not a terrible idea but the kids were all over, I'd just gotten off work and was trying to throw dinner together, and Dave was trying to get ready to go to work. Any fool could see I didn't exactly have the time to come lounge around their fancy apartment watching their big screen and playing their grand piano while I listen to how loud my kids are. Instead she stood in my doorway for 20 minutes while dinner got cold and we argued as nicely as possible. Then she suggested that we move to a 1st floor in the complex, we wouldn't even have to sign a new contract! Well yeah for you lady but look around. Do you see all this crap? Do I look like I have the time? NO! I don't. Nor do I have the desire to greatly inconvenience myself for your dog! I'm sorry we are loud. Go do something for once in your lives besides watch your stupid tv. I told her to give her dog an anxiety pill (nicely I swear) and she basically told me to have my kids walk solemnly around the house all day. Aarrgh!!!!
So here's my dilemna. I refuse to make my children act like monks in their own home. Kids skip and run and 2 year olds jump up and down when they are mad. I understand her dog is her kid and all but what do I do? She complained to the manager who said too bad since we aren't noisy during "quiet hours". I have tried to explain over and over that we are doing our best but there are 4 of them and 2 of us. And quite frankly they are children and I will not make them behave like adults (as if they would listen anyways). And if you want peace and quiet don't live in an apartment. End of story. We have lived under a rock band, a large family, and spouse abusers. Deal with it. I try to keep the jumping to a minimum, but its cold now and we have Hailey. End of story. And if my kids want to play hide and seek at 4 pm they should be able too. And if I want to do an exercise video at 10 am I should be able to. This is my home. Even if I rent it. However, since I know I can be hot headed and stubborn I pose the question. Should I just ignore them and let kids be kids, or do I become nazi mommy and make them tip toe around all day? How do I make the next 4 months livable for all of us without the neighbors slashing my tires?

Mortifying Mommy Moments

For every old lady who has commented to me on how wonderful and sweet my children are, I dedicate this story to you. This evening I needed to go to Target and JoAnns. We aren't talking major overload the cart grocery shopping here, so you'd think my kids could handle an hour in public. But noooo. Ten minutes into Target, I'm browsing the clearance racks for a new top and hear my girls fighting. I kid you not, when I looked over there they were, rolling around on the floor wrestling over a shoe. Literally wrestling! On the floor, in a crowded Target. After they get the whispering shouting from me, they proceed to hide behind the racks of clothes against the back wall and pull ALL of the clothes off. Seriously. McKenzie is almost 8. We picked up the things we needed and cruised through toys (my new Gregory bribery). The entire time I'm telling Hailey stay off the cart. Don't hang on the cart you'll tip it over. Get off of the cart. Over and over and over. Hailey is either hanging off the cart tipping it onto 2 wheels, or running off leaving me yelling at her like some bad mom who can't keep track of her wayward child. Who I'd like to add is almost 6 and knows better.

Needless to say by the time we get to JoAnns I'm not impressed. I only needed 2 things for a project. Get in, get out. Immediately Hailey starts hanging off the cart again. The JoAnns carts are teeny tiny and tip easily. And Connor is sitting in the front. We're standing in the notions aisle and I tell her for millionth time to get off the cart now! As soon as she hops off, I turn to get what I need. I've got my hands full while I compare items, when out of the corner of my eye I see the cart moving in a weird way. I turn just in time to see the cart tipping over, towards the handle with Hailey scrambling to get out of its way before it lands on her. All I can see is poor Connor's head headed towards the concrete floor. I drop everything, grab him like an inch from the ground, and just went balistic psycho mommy on Hailey. I was so ticked off at the kid I couldn't see straight. I didn't realize how loudly I was yelling at her until I looked up to see a woman standing at the end of the aisle with wide eyes and her mouth hanging open. She's just staring at me like I'm a crazed drug addict who's beating her child. Lest you think I have completely lost it I wasn't saying anything mean just the usual "HAILEY HUISMAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING! I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH THE CART! variety of yelling. There may have been some strong, shaking finger pointing going on also. I was angry and it scared the crap out of me. So I take it down to scary mommy whisper-yelling and find her a time out corner until I stop seeing red.

So now you're thinking "man that's embarrassing" glad it wasn't me. But wait, it gets worse. Instead of high tailing it out of there like I maybe should have, I get what I came for. If I drag all those kids into a store I'm getting what I came for. When I walk up to the cutting table every one is literally staring at me. They aren't even trying to hide it. I asked if they heard me yelling and of course they all did. I explained what had happened, but the staring continued. I was trying to be all cool and funny about it, but I think I just came off as lame. And of course the woman at the end of the aisle who witnessed it all was there too. I'm sure as soon as I left she told everyone else about the crazy drug mommy who screamed like a banshy at her kid. One of the employees was on the phone, and I was sure she was calling the police for the first couple of minutes, until I heard her talking about fabric. Then the checkout lady looked at me all weird, and when I asked, she of course had heard it too. I'm pretty sure the whole store heard me screaming at Hailey. I give her an abbreviated version of the story and call the kids who have of course all disappeared. They come flying to the front, Hailey totally body checked Greg on the way, sending him flying. And of course everyone nearby happened to be watching this too. I felt slightly vindicated like "Hey see she is wild its not just me."

I realize some of you probably skimmed my rambling because I'm obviously venting here. The jist of my blog is this: my kids are not suited for public appearances. They act like animals and I totally lost my temper (and don't feel too bad about it). I was horribly embarrassed.
The rest of you are probably thinking "um Liz isn't this what happens everytime you take your kids out?" Sadly yes. Sometimes the truth hurts.

Fall

We always take the kids up to Manito Park in the spring and summer but it is just beautiful in the fall. They hadn't raked the leaves up yet and it so pretty. We went to an area we don't usually go to since we usually stick to the pond and flower gardens and there was this whole quiet, grassy section with all of these leaves. It was just a perfect fall day.

Sadly this is the best picture I got of all 4 kids. My camera batteries died and I didn't have any backups. I even asked a couple of other people I'd seen around with cameras for some but no luck.

Mmm leaves. Nothing like a little extra fiber in your diet there buddy. Hailey loves her baby.

I just love this picture of Connor. Dave has decided his new nickname will be Chubs in honor of the original Chubs since our boy is living up to that nickname quite nicely.


We took the kids up to Hidden Acres apple orchard to get apples and pumpkins a few weekends ago. I'd wanted to go back to Walter's where we'd always gond as kids but it has turned into some sort of shopping mall for people who want to pretend they did something outdoorsy. They have a parking director, huge crowds, and when I tried to go into the store to I got shoved around by women in leather jackets and high heeled boots. Hello this is an apple farm not Nordstroms! Needless to say I was disappointed that my childhood memories were not going to be lived up to, so we left for less fancy pastures.

The kids enjoying their cart ride courtesy of Dave.

We had been pumping up this hayride with the farmer all afternoon, the kids were so excited especially Greg. Like any smart parent we saved it for last so we'd have something to hold over their heads for good behavior. Only when we got to the hayride, the driver was leaving. I chased him down and asked if he was doing anymore. He was on his way home. So I gave him this sad story about how excited my kids were and my little boy who was so looking forward to it. Then to clinch the deal I pointed over at my kids who were all standing so forlornly by the tractor (they had some pretty genuinely sad faces on). The poor guy didn't stand a chance. He was like geesh I can't say no to that and hopped back on his tractor. Thanks hay ride driver! You made their day. He even sang farm songs the whole time.

Hailey was our pumpkin hauler. She ran back and forth between the cart and the other kids carrying pumpkins. Surprisingly (or maybe not so much) after all this and a soccer game she still came home bursting with energy. Go figure.

Halloween...You Betcha!

McKenzie and Hailey have discovered the true meaning of Halloween...eat until you're sick. As soon as you're feeling slightly better, eat a bunch more. They were so hyper this weekend I thought I was going to go crazy. Honestly, Greg didn't eat a regular meal for 3 days. Poor Greg was so freaked out about Halloween. He thought it would be a bunch of scary people jumping out at him the whole time. When we went to the ward Halloween party on Tuesday, we assured him all the way there it would not be scary. Our youth put on a carnival for Halloween, and we happened to park right by the window where they were doing a haunted house. So much for trusting us. We hop out of the car to the sound of kids screaming and poor Greg froze in his tracks. We made sure to steer him clear of that and stick to freaked out child appropriate activies. My parents went trick or treating with us on Halloween since Dave had to work. We found a fun neighborhood to trick or treat in and yay! it wasn't freezing. It was the best Halloween in years since I didn't want to just hide in my car with the heat blazing. Greg was still scared and walked around solemly all night sucking on his lips (its his scared thing.) My parents took us to Krispy Kreme afterwards because the kids just hadn't had enough sugar coarsing through their veins yet.

Here's Kenz with her beloved donut on a string. Sadly she isn't posing for this shot. That kissing face is her actual normal face before she eats a donut. She loves them a little too much.

The girls and their loot. Greggers is my timid little dinosaur in the background.

At the ward Halloween party. Greggers is a dinosaur, Connor has Greg's old cowboy costume, Kenzie is a princess and Hailey is Hannah Montana complete with fiber optic glowing wig. A necessity for every little girl.

I don't remember dressing up for Halloween since the 6th grade when I went as the Phantom of the Opera and no one knew who I was supposed to be (hard to believe I didn't have any friends, I know.) So with that great track record, I decided to see how many more people I could make not want to be my friend and dressed up as Sarah Palin. My nametag said "McCain - Palin, Gettin Mavericky" I'll let you be the judge if this was meant to be supportive or ironic. Let's just say when I went trick or treating it didn't go over as planned, but the kids bagged extra candy from my "fans." Bonus : I got to say "you bethcha" a lot.

Chronic Lateness

So you all know how I'm always late to everything and therefore my entire family is always late to everything including church. So this past Sunday we were on time for once. As in we heard the announcements on time. Something we haven't done in months. Usually we stroll in seconds before the Sacrament Prayer and hang out in the foyer until after Sacrament is passed. This means Greg only has to wait a few minutes to break into his snack bar he's brought along and we miss all the opening stuff. So as we're raising our arm for releasings and sustainings Greggers keeps asking me what I'm doing. And he keeps asking louder and louder "mom why you waving like that" "who you waving at?" I'm trying to tell him what's going on but he just keeps asking louder and louder. I'm thinking its quite apparant to those immediately around us that we aren't here for sustainings too often. Then he's freaking out that he can't have his snacks. See we have this rule that he can't have his snack until after Sacrament is passed. Being on time probably made the time until snacks seem like an eternity to a 2 year old. Now he's yelling "is it done yet?" Because usually he doesn't witness anything other than Sacrament being brought into the foyer. I was hoping that even though it seemed really loud no one else actually heard my son's announcement that the Huisman family is chronically late. No such luck. When I went into the foyer with Connor later a woman that had been sitting near us joked about Greg's commentary earlier. So there you have it. My lateness has gotten so bad that my son thinks church is some snacks followed by nursery.

Mississippi

I finally got around to unloading my camera so I finally have pictures of our trip to Mississippi. I realize I'm a little behind since this was a few weeks ago but whatever when am I ever on time for anything? We had a great time. Hailey was so excited to see Maddie, it was probably the happiest day of her life. A few days ago she was feeling sad about friends at school. She said yeah these girls, Joanna and MacKenzie were her friends but Maddie was special. It was so sweet. Greggers and Sa got to work on their wedding plans. While Hailey worked to re-corrupt the Campbell kids. It was so great to see where they lived. Gregger's is really enjoying his custard. They have this great icecream place called Bop's there. We went twice in three days. When I asked Maddie what her favorite thing about Mississippi was she yelled "Bops!"

These are some pictures of the kids at the Jackson zoo. Hailey and Sa look just like sisters.

Theres this cool little plexiglass dome the kids can stick there head up through and watch the beavers. Unfortunately the pump was broken so the water was bright green and there were no beavers. But hey apparantly its still fun to stick your head up there.
This is Hailey's monkey. He followed her wherever she went around cage and would climb up to where we were. He probably sensed her innate ability to find a treat anywhere and thought he could get a hookup.
Hailey and Maddie on the carosel.

We went to the Mississippi natural history museum. It was a lot better than I thought it would be. It was actually pretty cool. The kids are all piled on a giant frog statue.

Greggers running around Nik and Da's new backyard. Its hard to tell but the grass is as tall as him. Everything there seems like it grows really fast. Da's dream life. A lawn of fast growing grass. How long tell he's got Nik out there 9 months pregnant mowing the grass? I see the concrete lawn coming.

Connor and Jack playing while we check out the house. My favorite part of their house is the master bath. Its so awesome. I took several pictures of it. I think the fact that I was so excited about a bathroom may indicate I've lived in an apartment too long.

Here's the tragic death of the Previa. I think it looked worse in person. It sure felt worse. I really enjoyed the way the back hatch would rattle every tiny bump afterwards like it was about to fall off.

It was a great trip. It was so good to see them again. Mississippi was actually way more normal than I'd expected. I expected a bunch of weird backwards hicks and women that looked like Designing Women. Its so pretty there, everything is so green. I know why Miss is the fattest state in the nation, AWESOME FOOD! Nik took me to this great restaurant called Juleps. I'm still craving those cheese fritters. Yay to Da for watching all 6 kids so Nik and I could have a girls night out. I think it was good for me and Hailey to see where they lived. I thought the fact that it took an entire day to fly there would be a good indicator of how far they lived. But Greg still thinks we can just hop in the car and cruise on over. It was so great of Dave to set this trip up for us. It was so thoughtful of him. He loves to torment me about Nik, but he really came through on this. Who'd of thought he'd think this up and research it out for me. He secretly wants of to be neighbors again, I know it.

Boys are so special

Sadly this is a true story. I was changing Gregger's stinky diaper when he starts wiggling his bum all around and straining. Thinking there was something going on I didn't want to experience I tried to quickly put a new diaper on him. He starts yelling "no, no I trying to fart." Well that's just great but I'd really like to have that region covered just in case if you know what I mean. "NO mom I want to fart on you. Take my diaper off!" I'm hurrying faster now, not taking any chances here. "Mom I want to fart you head! Its coming, take it off", pulling his diaper off. I quickly re-diapered, wrenched his pants on and hurried him on his merry way. He chased me out of the room yelling "Mom wait, I want to fart your head!" Ah motherhood. Seriously what is turning my sweet little toddler into this disgusting little boy? Is this what I have to look forward to?