Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Confessions of the Tragically Unorganzied

I have been a hopelessly unorganized and scatter brained person for as long as I can remember. I can never finish cleaning a room because the second I leave the room or see something else that needs done (or I want to do), I'm gone. My brain has leaped ahead to the next thing. I have a to do list that will never be completed. I'm late to everything, no matter how hard I try. It doesn't matter how much time I give myself to get ready, kids ready, and get there, I will be late. Inevitably something will go wrong or I will get sidetracked. My house is always a mess. I will dig down in one room, get it nice and clean, but every other room in the house is trashed. Within 30 minutes the room I just cleaned will be trashed too. (Don't worry I haven't food poisoned anyone. Underneath all of the clutter its all bleached.) I'd like to say this is all the kids, but dang it, I cannot get myself to put everything away every time. To a super clean, organized person, I am a tragic case. I'm like the druggie that people think sending to rehab a waste of time.

Now don't get me wrong, I want to be more organized, on time, etc. I am constantly buying new things to organize myself, the house, or the kids. Every other week I have some new plan that will help me remember what needs done and keep myself organized. Everyday is a new day of "today I will not be late." AA would have kicked me out long ago. So, awhile ago I subscribed to this Real Simple email called "If you just do one thing." Everyday they send you an email with one thing you can do to get ahead of the game so to speak. Today's was, wait for it it's a good one, Make a Laundry Schedule. That's right a laundry schedule, as in on Monday I wash sheets, Tuesday towels, Wednesday whites, and so on. Supposedly this will magically give me time to spare and more energy too! I nearly peed my pants laughing. Are they kidding me? Is my laundry going to take any less time because I did all of the sheets on Monday? Are the kids going to magically start changing their clothes less frequently? Stop wetting their beds? Really?

Now I know somewhere out there some woman read that today and immediately whipped up a cute, embellished laundry schedule and posted it promptly for all to see. She probably even made a family home evening about organization to showcase her new chart. Tomorrow she will drive to the Hobby Lobby and buy the wood to make some sort of handy dandy Family Laundry Schedule. And it will look cute enough to be a decoration in her home, her family will follow it to a T and everyone's laundry will not be shoved under their beds. Next fall she will lead a super Saturday activity on how to make one. So lovely.

I am clearly not this person. At my house if you find your pants drawer empty, first you cry to your mother, as this is clearly a tragedy. Then I instruct you to dig in "the laundry mountain" as it is known in our house. If all else fails, you have to dump out the hamper and find the cleanest pair. This usually involves more crying, imagine a lot of sobbing here, "Mom, why didn't you do the laundry yesterday? You said you would. Why aren't my pleather leggings clean? My sparkly one's are dirty too! What am I going to wear?!" Umm regular pants?

For years I have felt rather guilty and bad about myself. I know it's dumb, but I do get really down on myself about the clutter, unfinished projects, lack of clean clothes, lateness, lost papers, lost checkbooks, lack of real groceries (sometimes), overdue everything, the list really goes on and on. Also, add a lot of self depreciating talk about why can't I be on time, EVER?! Every time I start one of my new "I'm going to be organized now" kicks, I dive in all or nothing. And then I obsess about it. If its not done perfect, I stress. The first day of being too busy to adhere to the laundry schedule will result in, well, making it worse.

Now for those of you who haven't chucked your computers across the room by now, or unfriended me on Facebook (because I'm clearly crazy), let me assure you first, that I have a point, and second, I'm medicated so no worries. So here's my grand revelation. I am giving up. We are going to aim for good enough. As long as the basics are covered it's all good. The house will never be immaculate, or very clean for that matter, and tomorrow I am going to give my laundry the same minimal attention I always do. But who cares? Your favorite outfit might not be clean right away, but I'll get to it, eventually. And in the meantime I will aim to make sure you always have clean pants, food to eat, a cleanish home and maybe a few more chores. The kids papers will continue to pile up on my desk, but rest assured, the permission slips are signed and the reusable stuff has been reused for printing coupons, (which we can pretend I will organize with the new organizer I bought last week), and I will dig out the bills at least. As long as I get to everything eventually its all good.

So if you happen to swing by before I have a chance to make it look like I cleaned, don't worry, I'll get to it.